Offering Value

This is a good day to reflect on where I am. Similar to the effect of birthdays and New Years, this day marks two years following the day I finally surrendered to Christ.

When I started this site I was regularly writing of things I believed God was teaching me. I didn't have an outlet or community to share with and so used this hoping that something might be found useful to another. Over time I drifted from there to being focused on the need to produce new things to post here. I tried different things for inspiration and gave myself artificial due dates. There were some lapses marking sin or depression or simple writer's block. In the last few months I've found myself looking back at previous posts to find truths I wish I had known and applied in the previous week. I was posting things which I promptly forgot and never applied. Clearly I wasn't learning what I claimed to be learning. If what I was writing did not teach me, how could I teach another? I know there was truth in my writing, but I believe I lost insight in much of it.

So with this past month's break to think about where I've been and where I am, I've come to conclusion that it is better to allow posts to come at their natural pace. Not bound by a predefined schedule, but released after effort, time, and consideration. To only post here what is of worth. It will be up to me maintain the discipline of continuous writing that practice requires, but that will become a background activity. I expect in practice this will mean posts will be even more rare.

As far as I can tell there are now only two or three regular readers out there. So to you, I offer apologies again for any perceived loss. If that number ever changes for greater or less I will no longer know, as I have now disabled my counter software so that I will no longer fret or be anxious about who might be lurking out there or who may be finding their way here.

Tringard "Josh Martin"

Time for a break

I have taken a lot of breaks unintentionally in the past from posting here. But this month I have decided to take an "official" break while I ponder the intent of this site. It has certainly strayed from what I described at the start and thus I feel as though I need to rebuild a vision of what this site means to me.

I will return August 1st with the results of this month and what I intend, whether this site should continue or not.

Still More Grace

Thank you Lord for letting me see
Baring my heart's deceit
I weep for the sin which abounds
More than I knew hides here
It conceals itself in noble
Pursuits; desires, righteous,
It hides in matters, gray; what more
Lurks still, hidden in me?
Teach me to love, desire Your Grace
I see how much I need
Just for what You have revealed here
Set my focus on You
Turning my eyes and heart to see
Only You, Your holiness;
I want to desire Your goodness
Daily filled wanting You
To grow in Your grace, not for sin
To grow still more; but Grace
To walk in Your ways, righteousness,
Grace to live, pleasing You.

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Learning from Piper's second message at New Attitude 2007 - Discerning What Pleases God: Personal Obedience (available to listen to and download here)

Prayer for Healing

On Monday and Tuesday, Focus on the Family aired the majority of a message given by John MacArthur on the National Day of Prayer last month in which he used Romans 1 to say, "I'm convinced, beyond doubt, that in the same sense, God has abandoned America" (that sense being as God giving Israel over to their idols as is in, for example, Judges 10:6-7).

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One day, all will bow down
Seeing Your holiness; worship
Will be the World's response.
This nation I call home has strayed
Far, embracing the world
In pursuit of sin, seeks pleasure
Forgetting You, their God;
Please restore us, work in the hearts
Of this nation to turn
See Your holiness, You are good
Through Your work alone can
We see, turn, and walk in Your ways
I long for Your return
But I desire that this, my home,
Would be looking for You
That day, All seeking to worship.

New Attitude 2007

So I was at the New Attitude conference this past weekend. A tremendous experience that I hope to write about more. For now, as a first step in collecting my thoughts, I transcribed the notes I took during the trip. Since I took those notes with the intention of sharing them with those I know, I thought I might share them here as well. You can access them at:
http://docs.google.com/Doc?id=dcjn2vrv_33f5m63t

I actually arrived late Thursday and used the day and a half before the conference to explore the downtown area some. That is also recorded briefly in my notes.

There are others that took notes live (or at least posted more immediately) including Challies.com, the Rebelution, and Boundless Line. They surely took more comprehensive notes than I. Finally, all of the talks have been made available for download for free, here.

The theme this year was on Discernment and the sessions included:

• Josh Harris - Teaching an introduction to the topic
• Mark Dever - Discerning Our Doctrine, on handling conflict in the church and how to recognize when to divide and when to agree to disagree (and disagree well)
• Al Mohler - Discerning Your Culture, how to live in the world, but not of it
• CJ Mahaney - Discerning Our Hearts, on recognizing idols our hearts create (hint don't trust yourself)
• Eric Simmons - Practical Discernment, how to approach those "gray" areas in life
• John Piper - Discerning What Pleases God: Himself, classic Piper message
• John Piper - Discerning What Pleases God: Personal Obedience, Proper and improper ways to approach obedience to God
• CJ Mahaney - Take It Back, Conclusion and things to consider for how to take back so much and begin to apply it

My starting place for application is with Piper's second message. There are things in that which I believe address some of the issues I've been struggling with lately.

If you do (or don't) read my notes and have questions and comments, feel free to leave them here and I'll respond as able.